5 yr old Girls, Deafness and CHD
THE DEATON FAMILY
http://www.alittlechildlikethis.blogspot.com
Age of Children at Adoption 5 yrs
Special Needs of Children Deafness and CHD (Congenital Heart Disease)
deafness, CHD, two at a time, 5 yrs old, older child adoption
Our Experience in China
Our China experience was good and bad. Good because the girls came to us with smiles and no tears. Left with us with a whimper and some anxiety, but no hysterics or tears. By day 5 when it was time to visit the orphanage, they clung to us like monkeys, not allowing any of the nannies to even hug them.
The bad…..no language. Iley who could hear and had CHD was a wild thing. Literally bouncing off the walls wild….wouldn’t listen to anyone, naughty, laughing being goofy…which we know now was a total reaction to the situation. She was scared to death. She was coping. But while there, we thought WOW what did we get into.
Wren, the one that is deaf was much calmer and easier, she was interested in looking looking looking at everything.
We had trouble getting both of them to sleep at night, and keeping Wren in bed
It is HOT in Guangzhou! You WILL sweat. take cool clothing.
Our Experience Once Home
Once home Iley settled down almost immediately and we fell in love with her charm. Night time was still a challenge, and just learning the routine, their likes and dislikes takes a while. bonding is not instant. You feel like you are babysitting someone elses kids for a while.
Wren once home started to challenge and test us. She was the easy one in China, and has been our biggest challenge now home. Both girls have bonded well with us, and now feel like our own.
Our Advice
Don’t be afraid to “be the parents” they will still like you. We were firm with the girls from the beginning. Try to set clear firm boundaries. Say yes as much as possible, and love them like crazy, but do NOT let them take control. They will try. Trust God to lead you. Lean on Him. It is HARD, but worth it. It is the hardest thing I have ever done, but one of the most rewarding as well. Trust that God already knew you would be at this point, reading these words…..scared to death…..afraid you are ruining your family, He knows. You will make mistakes. You will go to bed in tears. You will lock yourself in the bathroom for space. He knows all of that and yet he still called you to go. Whom will I send? Send me Lord:) Best of luck!! Take that leap of faith. It will only make you stronger, and draw you closer to the creator.